POLITICAL SATIRE
Does Meles Zenawi's five-point peace plan include coffee?
By Bitweded Mequanint
Nov 27, 2004
As recently as two months ago, Eritrean government officials were in the Barentu region, warning the war-torn Kunama people of a possible war with Ethiopia.*

"The Woyanes have occupied our lands," the officials told the people. "Despite an international court ruling which ordered the Woyanes to vacate Eritrean territories, the Woyanes have remained defiant, and to this day for two years, Eritrean territories are under enemy occupation. All peaceful avenues have been exhausted, and Eritrea is legally obliged to use force to evict the enemy."

The people, who were ordered to attend the meetings Derg-style (warning anyone staying behind would face penalties), responded fearfully that they had lost their children in the previous wars, and were now living in utter poverty, and they were not ready at any cost to hear about another round of war with Ethiopia. Word of mass grievances reached strongman Isayas in Asmara, and the chief administrator of the Barentu area was fired.

The above incident is of course one of the many strings that have woven the fabric of Eritrean society as a highly-policed nation in the world.

Given the endless 'festivals' and seminars in Eritrean communities both inside and outside of Eritrea, the talk is always centred around Ethiopia, and how to deal with the country Eritrean war fanatics see as their enemy that blocked Asmara from becoming golden-state Singapore in the Horn of Africa.

If coffee is the hard-currency earner of Ethiopia, there is no doubt WAR is the No. 1 hard-currency earner of President Isaias. During the 1998-2000 war with Ethiopia, annual cash flow into Asmara averaged $300 million. After Meles signed the Algiers Peace Agreement, however, the flood of cash into the coffers of Isaias came down to a trickle. Reason? Most Eritreans lost hope in the meaning of financing a war that had brought Ethiopian troops dashing to the gates of Asmara. Only their man in Addis saved them! "Long live Meles," they chanted! (Eritreans are too proud to state the obvious in public; they just whisper in private. Quietly, they said, 'Long live our little man in the Grand Palace of Addis Ababa!)"

So in essence, war for Isaias is what is peace for healthy societies. By any means, there must be a war with any one of the neighbors in the Horn. But no war business brings Asmara a huge profit than a war with the country that had at one time turned Eritrea into the 13th Coffee Exporting nation on Earth. Why Isaias eyes Ethiopia as a fitting target for war is also partly based on his intimate knowledge that Ethiopia is, unfortunately, under the control of a man the Eritrean leader once belittled as "timid." There has never been an occasion when Isaias Afwerki's demand has been turned down by Meles-the-timid. So, when Isaias dismissed a few days ago Meles Zenawi's Peace Plan as a publicity gimmick, it is not by doubting Meles would fail to deliver on his promise. The message is rather directed at Meles to go beyond the issue of territory. Will Meles Zenawi's five-point peace plan include to help turn Eritrea into a coffee exporting nation? We don't know the details yet. But there is enough evidence Meles will do that. The No. 2 of the five-point Peace Inititiative mentions the loaded phrases of "addressing the root-causes" of the conflict, and the "Normalization of Relations." What is the implication?

A Return To 'Status quo Ante'

President Isaias will certainly, and old Shaebia-buddy Meles knows that, demand for the restoration of Eritrea's priviliges to the status quo ante: in addition to coffee, Ethiopia must:

a) drop Djibouti and start using the Port of Assab which used to shower Eritrea with a lavish annual financial bonanza of $120 million (all figures in U.S. dollars, ladies and gentlemen!)
b) Ethiopia must respect the rights and privilege of Eritreans over Ethiopians to withdraw - without much ado - huge sums of money in the form of lendings at negligible interest rates from the National Bank of Ethiopia
c) All those Eritreans deported must be returned to their respective properties and jobs throughout Ethiopia
d) Any Eritrean shall enjoy - as per the status quo ante - the right to run non-taxable commercial business enterprises in such big cities like Addis, Nazareth, Dire Dawa, Awassa, Bahir Dar, and of course any city the Eritrean finds worthy of time and investment.
e) Eritrean nationals would once again control key government positions in Ethiopian Airlines, Telecommunictions, Chambers of Commerce, Trade and Tourism, and of course Ethiopian Air Force in Debre Zeit.
f) And finally Nakfa! Will Meles agree to trade bunkrupt Nakfa on equal terms with old-gold-currency Ethiopian Birr?

Peace doesn't come at an easy price for Mr. Peace Campaigner Meles Zenawi. This is a short, tentative list Meles must resolve quickly before the rage of President Isaias boils over, and derails Mr. Meles Zenawi's invisible "War on Poverty!"

Both Isaias and Meles know the threat of war from Asmara is not about ownership of the undisputed Ethiopian territories of Badme, Irob, and even the Red Sea Port of Assab. It is about the 'economy stupid.' Eritrea, seated on an arid ever-spreading Sahelian wasteland, has no resources. The condition is so hopeless for Eritrea that sympathetic Egypt recently donated seven tons of onions to Asmara (Source: Awate.com).

Therefore, Meles must be willing to bring to life the Eritrean economy from among the dead, and let it gallop at 8 percent annual growth pre-1998 style. Will Meles meet the preconditions set by Mr. Isaias? Well, we have to wait and see until Meles Zenawi's "Strong Parliament" in Addis meets in the shortest time possible, and hammer out solutions to what Meles calls the "rootcauses" of the conflict with Eritrea. And we are optimistic that the outcome would be positive in favor of Eritrea, like the handing over of the people of Badme and Irob-Alitena to Eritrea was done before we woke up from our sleep, and had time to make coffee.


*(The news report from the Barentu Eritrea for this political satire was obtained from a website run by Eritrean National Alliance: Nov 18/11/04)
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